So close, yet so far
June 9, 2014 § Leave a comment
It’s the beginning of day 4 of “studying” for our last exam: biochemistry. It covers 3 semesters worth of material and we still set aside only 6 days to prepare. I think we underestimated just how exhausted we would be after the anatomy exam. I’ve gotten to a point where I just don’t care any more (I care, I just don’t feel like I do). I’m going through the motions of studying, but I feel like I’m getting nowhere and am having such a hard time keeping focused. Exam period is the worst. It requires the energy and power of a sprint, for the length of a marathon.
I’m losing hope that I will be able to pass on Thursday. There is so much information and I don’t know if I have anywhere to put it. My brain and eyeballs feel like they are wrapped in saran-wrap that just keeps getting tighter and tighter. This makes me even more frustrated because the one thing I want is to be done with second year and I feel like I am just dragging it out. Things have gone well so far and there is just this one more hurdle to seal the deal. I want to sleep without feeling like I should be doing something else. I want to enjoy the beautiful summer days and read books that have nothing to do with school. I want to do a new art piece and sit at a café without studying. But this is the part where I have to remind myself that this is what I want to do more than anything. If I had the option 0f being where I am now and any other point in the past, I would choose this moment in every case. We’ve feared this exam period since we started medical school and now it’s almost over. We can do this last stretch!