June 10, 2014 § Leave a comment
Yesterday I made the hard decision to do something I’ve never done before: change my exam date. By yesterday evening, I had only gotten an hour and a half of studying in and the tight saran-wrap feeling in my head and eyes was overwhelming. Normally I am able to push through being tired (with the help of caffeine) but this level of exhaustion has been something entirely different. With only two days left until the exam, I had to finally admit to myself that I was not going to be able to do the sort of cramming I would need to do to pass. So, I decided to push my date until Tuesday next week and then took the rest of last night and the whole of today off. My hope is that I will now be able to cover more material and that I will have a better grasp of the topics. Biochemistry is my weakest class, which is unfortunate because it is going to be so extremely important next year, when we start learning diseases. (During the first two years we learn everything about the healthy body, third year we learn everything that can go wrong with it, and from 4th year on, we learn how to fix it.)
I had grand plans for what I was going to do with this time. Go for an early morning walk, picnic in the park with a book, sit at a café with said book, oh and also, sleep in, nap, take a long bath. Reality? I watched the entire second season of Orange is the New Black (in our dark, air conditioned bedroom), did some laundry and went for a two hour walk. Those other things will just have to wait until exams are over. I’m hoping that I will be ready to go by tomorrow morning. At least I got some fresh air and was able squeeze in a day without stress.
Jannie and Skjalg both kept their date for Thursday. I feel a bit like I am taking the easy way out, but there is always going to be doubt in this type of decision. I have to focus on what is best for me and what I am capable of. Exam period is not the time to compare yourself to others (if you are a prospective student, remember this!). Everyone does things at their own pace, many are lucky, many are unlucky. As my mama has told me, it doesn’t matter how you get from A to B, as long as you get there.
It’s almost 23:00 and my plan is to shower and head to bed with a book. It doesn’t really matter which one, I probably won’t make it past the first page. Here are some hasty shots from my walk today. I took it slow and made sure to take in the summer warmth and beauty of the city. We are so lucky to study here and I’m happy that we can appreciate moments like this, though they are few and far between. I know that as the years go by we will reminisce on those days we were young medical students in Budapest…